Grood.com

On March 30, Minnesota Timberwolves center Eddie Griffin was drunk and masturbating when he crashed his luxury SUV into a parked Suburban outside a store in Minneapolis, according to a lawsuit filed Thursday by the man whose Suburban was hit in the crash. Several 911 callers that night said Griffin was drunk. One witness said Griffin told him he was watching pornography in a DVD player mounted on the dashboard of his Cadillac Escalade SUV when he struck a Chevy Suburban parked on University Avenue Southeast. [Source]

Sure, driving while talking on your cell phone can hinder your judgment as much as if you were drunk, but what about if you’re drunk while masturbating? Perhaps the people who did the study in the previous article should have done an extra experiment. I would like to help out in that study.
- “What’d you do last night?”
- “Dude, I got paid to get drunk and masturbate and drive! It was awesome.”

This entry was posted on Monday, July 3rd, 2006 at 2:48 pm and is filed under Sports. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.