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The ibuprofren wears off at around 2 AM and I wake up. The pain is so much that it takes me about a minute to walk the ten feet to my bathroom to get more. I take two more and wait the longest twenty minutes ever for them to kick in. I wake up again at about 4:30 AM with the same problem. Any movement of my head sends blinding pain throughout my body.

I zombie-walk to my bathroom and grab more ibuprofen, ignoring the warning label on the bottle about overconsumption. I figure it will be a welcome relief if I die from an ibuprofen overdose. As I walk out of my bathroom I turn around and stare at the bathroom floor, seriously contemplating spending the rest of my night there in a fetal position. By now, I’m halfway convinced that there is some sort of insect burrowing its way into my head.

I decide to get in bed with my girlfriend. I figure it’d be useful to have her nearby in case I actually die, the possibility of which is increasing with every second. The thing with ear infection pain is that it is a throbbing pain. Just when you think it’s over or has at least subsided, a bolt of white hot pain surges through your ear again. And it happens over and over and is very frustrating. It is so frustrating, in fact, that I actually start crying. This is the first time that I have cried as a result of physical pain in at least fifteen years. My girlfriend asks, “Do you want me to take you to the emergency room?” That’s the last thing I remember.

Friday morning
I wake up at 6:30 in anticipation for my 8:15 appointment. I figure I will get there right at eight so I can fill out all the necessary paperwork associated with being a new patient and get in there. By now, I cannot tell if the pain has gotten less severe or if I’ve just gotten used to it. In all honesty, I don’t give a fuck. I just want to get to the doctor.

It’s a rainy day in Los Angeles , which would normally be a welcome thing for me since it rains only about once a month here. I’m actually worried about the thought of driving on a wet road still covered in at least a month’s worth of automobile fluids. If I get in a wreck, someone’s going to die either by the actual collision or the altercation that will ensue.

I make it to the doctor’s office unscathed at around 7:50. The pain has returned in full force. I put 50 cents in the meter and walk into the office right at eight. There’s maybe eight other people already waiting, people who probably have things like the flu or cholera or AIDS. Pussy stuff. I’ve got an ear infection here. The receptionist tells me my doctor was in a car wreck on the way in and I’m going to have to wait and be worked in with another doctor. The way I felt after hearing that, he might as well have told me he punched my mom in the face.

Half an hour goes by and still nothing, except for the sound of the waiting room emptying as each person is seen by a doctor before me. I’m on complete edge from the pain. It’s that kind of pain that makes your arms grow stiff and your heart actually hurts.

It’s 8:45 and still nothing. I get up and tell the receptionist that I need to go back down and put more change in the meter. I’d rather tell him to go fuck himself for keeping me waiting. I know this is not his fault in any way but still, he really should go fuck himself. Couldn’t hurt.

to be continued…

This entry was posted on Sunday, December 30th, 2007 at 1:18 pm and is filed under Editorials. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.