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About Grood
Editor in Chief
Doug
Doug Dixon took the writing world by storm in 1989 when he wrote a short story in his first grade class about the time he came home to find that his dog had taken a crap on his bed. Word eventually reached the principal who in turn actually mentioned the story and praised his writing ability during a school assembly. “Booyah,” Dixon later said of the event. “I am glad it was that story that broke me into the industry. It fully captured my style.”
Fifteen years later, Dixon would go on to graduate with a degree in professional writing and a minor in film from OU’s prestigious film and video studies program, whose famed alumni include that guy who bought Dixon a beer once and a hot Pi Phi who didn’t talk much.
Dixon has performed stand up comedy at small coffee shops and rundown comedy clubs throughout the LA area. He has also produced several low budget, low quality short videos dealing with high brow subjects such as a parody of 24 and a video dealing with autoerotic asphyxiation. “I think we shot that one wrong. It really embarrassed my mom.” Youtube would eventually ban the video.
In his spare time, Dixon enjoys running long distances (having completed 2 marathons), writing autobiographies in the third person, playing NCAA 08 and stir frying.
Contributors
Steve
I’m pretty much everyone’s worst nightmare. I’m one of the toughest, meanest, and nastiest people you’ll ever meet. I spent four years in the state pen and they let me out because the other inmates kept shitting themselves when I walked by. Kicking ass and taking names is what I do best.
I now live in Tulsa, one of the roughest cities in the state of Oklahoma. You’ve got to know how to hold your own if you want to survive out here. I run the T-Town Mafia, which is an organized crime alliance that controls much of the alcohol consumption this side of the Mississippi. I’ve got cops, attorneys, doctors, accountants, health inspectors and just about ever other industry in my pocket. Basically, if you want to know a place to get a drink, then you come to us.
Some people question how I can be such a badass and take care of so much business. The secret is time management and being built like a brick shithouse. When I’m not kicking ass, which is pretty much all the time, I like to bow hunt, drink beer, shoot porn, watch NASCAR, jamming to Whitesnake and maybe go to Home Depot. Those are just some things I do between scheduled ass kickings.
I live by one motto: “Eat right. Practice hard. And I’ll still kick your ass!!!”
Van
John Lennon was murdered on the exact minute of my birth, December 8th, 1980, which explains my weird obsession with Asians. Personally, I think it’s normal but the governments of Thailand and Indonesia think otherwise.
I think before I go any further, I’d like to address some rumors that have been following me through my rise to greatness. First of all, yes I have three testicles, and yes, only two of them are located in the crotchal region. Big deal. And yes, I was caught with my hands down my pants at a movie theatre in Sarasota, Florida, in 1991. But to my defense, my uncle was wearing those pants at the time. See, just a big misunderstanding. Now, if we can move on….
My family raised to me believe that laughter was the best medicine, which explains why many of them died of consumption. When I’m not writing pure gold, I can be found giving my woman the best sex of her life, releasing doves on a ghetto rooftop, and spittin’ rhymes on the corner of 21 and Lewis. If you want to know more of my life, just watch ‘2PAC: Resurrection.’ But replace ‘rapping’ with ‘playing Super Mario Bros. 3 on Gamboy D.S.’, ‘ghetto’ with ‘middle class neighborhood’, ‘black’ with ‘pasty white,’ and ‘rap war with Biggie’ with ‘rap war with NAS.’