By Doug on April 29th, 2009
I’m serious. I was talking to someone the other day and we played a quick game of “Where the hell is Dave Chappelle?” and she brought up that he is now on ABC’s Better Off Ted. I didn’t believe this because A) I was highly certain I would have known this and B) I was high. But I had reason to believe this woman because A) she was black and would know better than I do and B) I was high.
Turns out I’m right. Maybe.
I mean I guess they look similar but not in a they-all-look-the-same kind of way, which is how that would have sounded had I said the guy was Dave Chappelle. I mean, they’re both black and they both wear hats on occasion. Turns out the other buy is Malcolm Barrett, the same guy you’ve seen in those Bud Light “Drinkability” ads. Neat!
By Doug on April 20th, 2009
First off, people, stop sending me stupid marijuana-related text messages. I’m familiar with the way the Gregorian calendar works. I got it.
But on a 4/20 related note, here’s a pic I took last week of the one, the only, big Snoop Dogg as we waited at an intersection together in Hollywood. He’s a tall mofo. As we waited, I had that internal debate over whether or not to say something to him. I chose not since, well, what does a white guy say to Snoop Dogg on a Friday at 8:55 AM?
By Doug on March 29th, 2009
In the least shocking news of the day, the ShawmWow guy, aka Vince Shlomi, likes himself some hookers. According to The Smoking Gun, the ShamWow Guy “was arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room.” Long story short, a hooker bit his tongue and he Chris Browned her.
His mugshot:
So, it turns out that I am in fact not the only person that is frightened by the ShamWow guy. The man haunts my dreams…
By Doug on January 23rd, 2009
According to Deadspin.com, Jay McGwire, brother of controversial former baseball player Mark McGwire, has been busy pitching a book to publishers about how introduced the slugger to steroids and even injected Mark himself.
“Mark is a man I think most would like to forgive because his reason wasn’t nefarious - it was for survival,” Jay’s proposal says (read the rest here). “My bringing the truth to surface about Mark is out of love. I want Mark to live in truth to see the light, to come to repentance so he can live in freedom - which is the only way to live.”
First off, no shit he did steroids. We got it. Look at the pictures. Pleading the fifth in court doesn’t help you, either.
Secondly, this is directed more to my own brother, Steve:
Steve, you and I can both agree that we are probably closer than most brothers are. You and I both know we’ve been through a lot together, maybe even more so than most people do growing up. I love you. Hell, I even shed a tear while standing next to you at your wedding.
But, if I happen to become hugely successful at something I love and then you write a book that outlines how I cheated at accomplishing that success, I will fucking kill you. I’m just saying.
By Doug on July 8th, 2008
henderson213 (8:49:56 PM): saw hancock last weekend
Runboy82 (8:50:08 PM): you’re the olny person i know who saw it.
Runboy82 (8:50:30 PM): it got horrible reviews
henderson213 (8:50:47 PM): yeah it was pretty awful
henderson213 (8:53:10 PM): i read the other day that will smith had originally turned down the role of Neo in the matrix
henderson213 (8:53:34 PM): that would have been awesome.
henderson213 (8:53:44 PM): not for will smith cuz i can’t stand him. it would have been awesome because keanu wouldn’t have been in it.
henderson213 (8:54:07 PM): i mean the matrix is an awesome movie but keanu is just awful in it.
Runboy82 (8:54:12 PM): yeah
henderson213 (8:54:54 PM): likehe is in everything else
henderson213 (8:55:37 PM): anyone could have played neo better.
henderson213 (8:55:59 PM): nick hogan’s friend could have played neo better
Runboy82 (8:56:11 PM): god
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