Archive for the 'Videos' Category

Monday Night Football Cunnilingus

By Doug on October 30th, 2007

Trinity (TX) Laterals Their Way to Division III Win

By Doug on October 28th, 2007

Fire Alarm on Conan

By Doug on October 16th, 2007

A fire alarm interrupted the Monday, October 15th taping of Conan O’Brien.

10/14/07

By Doug on October 14th, 2007

Yeah so, I just got the Internet back and working since I canceled my land phone line. You wouldn’t think it’d take ten days to change a service but whatever. I mean, can it be more difficult than someone on their end having to click a couple of times with a mouse? Whatever.

I didn’t think it’d be all that hard to go ten days without the Internet. In fact, I thought it’d actually be quite liberating like when you go on vacation to a foreign country that doesn’t have Internet. Shiiiiiit, was I wrong. I’ve come to the conclusion that the Internet is my own version of crack. On day seven, I offered to blow a guy so I could use his wireless to check my myspace messages. True story.

Not really, but I will admit that I spent a little bit of time at the corner coffee shop drinking $3.50 Mexican cokes so I could use their wireless. Mexican Coca Cola is so choice. If you have the means, I highly recommend it. The key to it is they use actual sugar as opposed to high fructose corn syrup, resulting in a slightly peculiar taste. They way I see it, it’s the way coke is probably supposed to taste.

Interestingly enough, sixth on the list of ingredients on the Mexican coke bottle is “acid.” Just acid. It’s not the skin-dissolving alien blood from the movie Aliens nor is it the Pink Floyd type of acid. I guess they leave it up to you to figure out exactly what kind of acid it is. Ah, Mexicans.

So that’s about it. I’m just sorting out the mess of my life that has resulted from my fasting from the Internet. In the meantime, here’s another one of Andy Samberg’s digital shorts from last night’s SNL called “People Getting Punched Just Before Eating.” Andy Samberg (as well as Billy Hader) is the only thing about that show worth watching anymore.

Oh also, I had a funny conversation after I saw a promo on TV for Saturday Night Live:
Doug: “Foo Fighters are going to be on SNL this week.”
Person I was talking to: “Oh cool. When’s it on?”
Doug: “Uh…Saturday.”

Just like Barry Sanders, only white and 9 years old and female

By Doug on September 13th, 2007

If you ever wanted to see a 9-year-old girl take a bunch of boys to school on the football field, look no further.

Anti-drug ad from Above the Influence

By Doug on August 21st, 2007

The geniuses at Above the Influence are at it again with a new commercial. The chick smokes weed and her dog tells her how disappointed he is in her. I can’t tell if this is for or against marijuana. What kind of message is this sending to kids?

“So let me get this straight: I smoke weed and my fucking dog will talk to me. What’s the catch? He’s dissapointed in me? So what, at least it’s a start.”

If they really wanted to send a message to kids of the dangers of marijuana they would have had her get high and have a cobra come out and attack her. That’d get the message across. Or better yet, they should have had me rough her up because I’m such a hard ass.